I haven’t abandoned my blog, yet. I just have loads on my mind and not enough words to express all that have been going on.
I got a new job, moved to a new city, and am slowly but surely adjusting to my new status as a semi-grown woman. I am not fully grown yet because still, from time to time, I ask my folks for some cash to tide me over. But that na story for another day.
I aim to return to writing and blogging slowly. I have missed the space blogging provided for free expression; although to be quite honest, I previously didn’t make full use of it. In non-virtual reality, I don’t do well with self expression. I tend to hoard my problems to myself, and the few times I open up are filled with loads and loads of editing. This is what happens, I hear, when stability wasn’t part of one’s terrain in childhood.
I aim, via blogging, to achieve some kind of self-knowledge, love, and accountability. While I believe that I know myself well, I think that writing allows for a different kind of self exploration. If one is honest, in his/her writing, that is. As for self-love (not that kind), something tells me that I might have this tendency to self-destruct and/or inflict pain onto my own person. I am getting older and want to change certain things that I don’t like about myself hence the need for accountability. I need to devote myself to acquiring the virtues I need/admire and ridding myself of some, if not all, of my vices.
This marks the beginning.